کاش میتونستیم مثل قدیما باشیم. فرق نمیکنه تقصیر من بود یا اونا. هیچی دیگه درست نمیشه. حتی اگه تقصیر من باشه اونا حتی سعی هم نکردن. فقط ازش گذشتن. الانم به وضوح متوجه شدن ازشون دوری میکنم. فقط اینکه....اونا کنار هم قشنگ ترن. به من نیازی نیست

Even years apart, i still feel connected to you. Every time i reach out to hold what i have left of you it disappears. What i feel about you is almost like a "phantom pain". You are not there, are you? Then explain this feeling to me. I am scared. Scared to lose the last bits of memory we have in common. Do you still have them? Do you ever think of me when you give a look at your computer? In my heart i still hope that, when you go out for a walk and pass by that school, the one where we met the first time, you'll think of me, even for a millisecond. After all these years are you the same person still? Am I? Am I whispering to the wind stories about a person that is no more with us? Am I crying over something that doesn't exist anymore? I am starting to fear that it is true. In fact I am starting to forget your face. "You" still exist in my mind. So you are still real, are you? But what will happen when i'll forget those laughs we had togheter, the games we played those nights and all the problems we have caused to eachother? Will you still "exist"? > Signed, Your "best friend" F.X.

@Aioli That's completely normal. I draw too, and after a while I felt like I wanted to share my work. But I wanted to do it under a new, anonymous identity so that my family and people around me wouldn't know who I was or have access to it. Otherwise, I wouldn't feel free to express myself. I'd constantly hold myself back and think things like, "I won't post this because my friend might see it," or "I won't post that because a certain person might come across it." Do whatever you are comfortable with.

everyone is always connected. 🩷

@aioli it is only human to feel this way. it takes real technical mastery to put up the same front you did while expressing yourself. yet I genuinely think exposing unsaid parts of your mind will only bring you more intimate relationships. they won't come to know a different you they simply will know an unrevealed part of you. it will only feel more true to yourself if you speak your mind.

Is anyone else held back by the fear of being seen and known? I've started drawing and painting but it feel scary to put it out there, especially to people who know me IRL. Some inner sensor is telling me there is something very scary about sharing too much about myself publicly. For too many years, I've put up a front, for work, for family, and now shadding that, even just a bit, is terrifying. I hope this resonates with someone else. To those reading, I hope you are having a wonderful day.

resolve

من تلاشامو کردم. الان فقط میتونم تماشا کنم

@bibo Great idea lol

Let's all love Whitenoise

Trapped inside my skin yo white boy, honky, cracker, clear water, he ain't pink he pink (HE PINK!) these are the names I hear as I walk thru my streets in fear. I go to pick up my girl Ann but her daddy don't understand he won't pick up the door, why? He thinks I'm 5-0 I'm just a brotha trying to get a little bit you know! Yeah. "Yo white boy! Why do you wish to sit behind me on this bus white man mother fucka! You better take 2 steps back you about to get dropped." Ding ding, next stop! I'm walking now "hey white boy how dare you walk thru my part you ain't from around here!" "Leave him alone D he ain't hurtin no body." "Shut the [censored] up im talkin to the white boy!" pow pow stick stick! and darkness fell upon the white boy. "Yo white boy wake up yo they fucked you up" (fucked upppp) "Cassandra whatchu doin talkin to the white boy!" "Leave him alone he's mine I found the white boy I found him. What you gonna do kick his ass right here in front of the liquor store- " POW POW STICK STICK! And darknesssss fell upon da white boy fire pain my people slain but my tears can't flow like rain flow like rain we can't cry here and now my girl don't love me no mo so I'm at the door. And darkness once again fell upon the white boy.

What’s your favorite thing too get from Raising Canes? I really like they’re beef rice bowls

Hey Man I appreciate this website still exists. I check it out very rarely now but I truly hate when media of my younger years becomes lost.

love this site its so cool.

my mind is so clouded with such horrible shit all the time, of all that has happened to me lately in just this year alone, all of what ive done in the past. im disgusting. everything just floats around in my head and its so hard to forget it. i feel gross for how i present my body, for how i so easily let people see me. i hate how the only time i stop thinking is whenever someone is touching me. i want to stop thinking forever. why do i have to be a whore just to feel a little bit okay? there has to be something else, right? i need therapy